Sexual Assault

When I first asked Charlie for help I had blocked my rape out for 7 years the best way I knew how, silence. Everyday I suffered the consequences of this. Everyday I hummed with resentment; anger and hate that an individual could make me feel so insignificant and inadequate. Nearly every night I would have horrific nightmares that made me dread sleep. No one could touch my wrists, my hips or my neck. I held a lot of anger, and found it extremely difficult to mirror the emotions of those around me. I found it almost impossible to love the way I now know is properly and looking back on it now, I would refer to myself as quite ‘cold hearted’. Charlie allowed me to explain the event for the first time with zero judgement. I held a lot of self-blame, a lot of ‘if I had done this differently’. He helped me realise that nothing was my fault. That I had reacted in the best way I knew how. Over a few weeks he showed me how to feel. Something that may seem so simple to most, but for me it wasn’t. He taught me and allowed me to continue through the stages until I reached acceptance. Holding my hand, so to speak, the whole way, offering nothing but kindness and support. Today, I have no nightmares and sleep better than I have in years. I am touchable and hold hardly any anger. Opening up to Charlie was the best thing I have ever done. He saved me from a life of constant pain, and potentially self-destruction.